Dear some random kid,
Thank you for not only taking the time to fill out our information request form, but also using such eloquent prose to inform me that I suck dick. Fortunately for me, and unfortunately for you, all requests are logged by IP address and it was rather trivial for me to track down and contact your music and computer teachers. Now, how could I possibly know to contact your music teacher? Simple; you hit our Web server on a direct request with no referrer, so you were more than likely trying to find JW Pepper and Sons in search of sheet music. We field a few requests per week from students whose teachers give them the wrong URL.
Hopefully, you were still sitting at your workstation when your faculty received my e-mail. Hopefully, you are still sitting at your workstation now. Hopefully, you will learn that your are not anonymous on the Internet. Unfortunately, you will probably never read this, and I will never have the satisfaction of knowing one way or another whether or not you got owned.
I’m not usually such an ass. Believe it or not, I used to be a kid too and I pulled my share of pranks. I was just never stupid enough to get caught. Oh, and it wasn’t even your incredibly poor attempt at an insult that set me off; it was the fact that you used Niggaville as your city. No attempt at wit was made whatsoever. Bad monkey, no biscuit.